Rudolph the Drunken Reindeer
12-17-04

Sing along to the tune of "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer." Rudolph the drunken reindeer Was a very plastered one. Rudolph the drunken reindeer Never thought the drink was done. All of the sober reindeer Used to gag and call him names, Once he was caught drunk driving, They never let him pull the sleigh. Then when all the others died*, Santa sighed and said, “Though you’re very drunk tonight, “You will drive my sleigh—oh fright!” Now this drunk pilot reindeer Gets drunk every Christmas Eve, Rudolph the drunken reindeer Tries really hard not to heave. Now all the other reindeer, When they see his nose so bright, Know that he’s hit the tavern— Have a safe flight tonight!

                       *Make up some strange reason for all the reindeer to die--I didn't have enough space to make my own. My best friend helped me write this one. We felt weird that night, possibly due to lack of sleep, possibly due to the fact that her house is an extremely boring place, possibly due to the fact that her brother was bothering me. Well, why drunk? Well, why the heck else does Rudolph have a red nose? Smells suspiciously like hooch to me.

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